Tuesday, January 4, 2011

More than numbers

I hate when you go to the doctor's office and the first thing they do is weigh you. Why can't that be the last thing they do? Because after the height, weight, blah blah blah it makes me feel like a bunch of numbers. Last I checked my height didn't define me, but for those that care to know I am exactly 5'1.5" of fun-sized fun. And the other number isn't relevant to anyone but me, and really it shouldn't even be relevant to me. Because I am more than the number on the scale and the number on the scale just confirms what I already see in the mirror. I am overweight. I am completely 100% aware of this. I do not need anyone else to confirm it by commenting on what I eat (or rather don't eat) or noting what size jeans I wear. The number on the scale isn't relevant. However, how I feel about how I look and how I feel overall is relevant. I don't feel healthy in any way, shape, or form. I haven't felt healthy since high school and even then I wasn't the healthiest girl in the school. But I sure felt better then than I do now and it's no one's fault but my own. I own all of my numbers and I'm going to share a few of them with the blogging world.

Arms: 15 inches
Calves: 17 inches
Thighs: 29 inches
Hips: 48 inches
Belly: 45 inches
Chest: 36 1/2
Waist: 36 1/2

For those comparing my numbers to the "perfect" body I've got at least one of the 36-24-36 desired measurements down and who knew in high school that would ever happen?! I am not looking to achieve that perfect or ideal body either. I want to be healthy for me. I want to reach a goal weight that I'm happy with and not one that a chart on a doctor's office wall tells me I should be. I have hips, thighs, and a chest that outdoes most Hooter's girls and I love my curves. I just want them to be smaller curves. That's not too much to ask right?

I'm shooting for a goal weight of 140 and then I'll reevaluate once I get there. I have mini goals set for myself as well. From my heaviest, I have lost a total of 21 lbs. My next goal is to hit 30 lbs. I want to see a change in the pictures that I'll be taking (and *gulp* posting) every month. I know that I can do this. I am more committed than ever to losing the weight, losing the inches, and keeping this off. The first step is getting your head in the game, right? Well I'm on step two and the only place to go is forward. I hope you can keep up!

January 2011 Pictures
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4 comments:

  1. ElizabethJanuary 4, 2011 at 11:03 PM

    I commend you for posting this! I know it's tough to admit all that to yourself, but I think you're at a great starting point, especially since you've already lost some weight! Measurements is really where you can see the difference. Good luck and keep us posted!

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  2. RebekahJanuary 5, 2011 at 11:06 AM

    You can do this! I know you can do. Jess, you are a beautiful woman no matter what you weigh. Your insight, intelligence and heart make you such and Im glad to call you my friend!

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  3. AnonymousJanuary 14, 2011 at 7:02 AM

    I think you are beautiful. but you already knew that

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  4. josborne1502February 1, 2011 at 5:19 PM

    I agree with all of the above, and I am right there with you, I have a lot to lose and am nowhere near where I want to be even after losing 60lbs (yeah you read that right. And I am fun sized just like you at 5'1.5 although I fib and say I'm 5'2 it's easier :-)

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